Religion and Ethics Forum
General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: Rhiannon on May 18, 2018, 09:38:27 AM
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I find weddings odd. I suppose they should be great occasions for hope and celebration, but we all know that it’s fifty/fifty that the marriage will end in divorce. Then there’s the expense. And I’m with Colin Firth when he says that while other people are weeping with emotion, he’s weeping with boredom.
A really weird thing though is that I like the aesthetic of weddings. I genuinely love the dresses and flowers, and I’ve no idea why as big frocks aren’t my thing and flowers belong in the ground, not tortured bouquets.
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Not sure I see the substantial possibility of divorce as a 'con' against celebrating an event like a wedding. We are social animals and this is part of how we mark things. My reaction to any individual wedding is dependent on any number of factors, some I find exhilarating, others rather depressing, others a mix of both.
The aesthetic seems to me hugely adaptable to link into almost any other aesthetic. The most recent one I attended, I echoed Simon Callow in FWAAF that it was 'Bloody Brigadoon'. Going to one next week that is Aloha themed.
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Going to one next week that is Aloha themed.
Grief, what special hell is this?
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Grief, what special hell is this?
I'm looking forward to it. Just think of it as the Eurovision version.
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I remember some very long ones, with people waiting hours while bride and groom do unspecified stuff behind the scenes. All you can do is drink.
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I'm looking forward to it. Just think of it as the Eurovision version.
I think my perception of it is unduly coloured by a disastrous stopover in Hawaii in the 90's. Probably best to ignore. I like the idea of a Eurovision slant. ;D
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What a bunch of cynical rat-bags. Not liking weddings is as bad as not liking Christmas. Pooh to you with knobs on.
... just thought I'd log in to say that. How are you all? well I hope? ...good ...good.
Cheerio :D
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I don’t like Christmas either.
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I know
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I’ve heard though that Breezango are live tweeting the royal wedding. That makes it fabulous.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=p0kdJ2r3Idg
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Weddings - as we know them - are a fairly recent, Victorian, invention.
For most ordinary people, the act of living together would be considered marriage, possible seeking the blessing of the church after a while. (To an extent, we have returned to this practice - couples waiting until their children can be bridesmaids before having a wedding.)
For the gentry, marriage was about protecting property and forming alliances. To these people marriage had to be seen as a public declaration. Marriage would be elaborate and very public partly as a statement of self-importance, an opportunity to flaunt wealth, and partly to ensure that the intentions of the marriage were widely understood and accepted.
The Victorian "adjustment" was to encourage the lower orders to ape this behaviour. The focus shifted from the union of the couple to a display of extravagance driven by the social needs of the bride's mother. More recently, there has been a competitive element in weddings with (presumably) brides wanting to put on a more extravagant show than their best friends did. Consequently we have seen suggestions that a modern wedding can cost £20,000 ....
Well - it was almost half a century ago - my wife and I got married on £200. She made her own dress, we had no stag or hen party, our reception (self-catered) was held at her home. It took place in the local parish church (actually, just around the corner from the chapel being used for a certain wedding this weekend - so you may be able to guess which town ...) and we had a single hired wedding car. We had about 20 guests.
The marriage I admire most was that of a friend who came home one afternoon and told his mother "Me and Mavis popped into the Registry Office this afternoon and got married". Brilliant.
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I wish them every happiness, but I don't know them, and am not remotely interested in their nuptials. Ditto the football. I'm off for a bike-ride somewhere tomorrow, since it turns out that the Pipe club meeting I mentioned elsewhere was last week - a week early, no doubt due to the wedding and/or the football.
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If I were to marry again I’d whisper my vows to my partner on a hilltop then do the legals at the registry office.
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At some point on around my 60th birthday. I will drive across the U.S. and end up in Las Vegas to get 'married' by an Elvis lookalike in the Little White Chapel as tackily as possible. Had intended to do it at my 50th but as it came close it didn't feel like I was old enough to be that silly.
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Registrar or Register Office. Like the whispering on hilltop, very romantic.
I've been to loads of weddings, some went on a bit too long and were boring but i didn't object; one was quite cold tho' warmed up later on. They were all happy occasions at the time even if people did break up later on, that's life.
Am expecting to go to at least two weddings next year, close family, there may be two others but not yet confirmed. I don't care what form they take, I love the people concerned. I loved my wedding - & my sister's - which were simple & beautiful to my eyes.
Regarding tomorrow's 'big' wedding, I'm disappointed about one aspect I've just read in the news but as it isn't my business I'll try to put it out of my mind (may not be true anyway). I'll be at work from 9.30-1.30, will have it on in background on computer while I'm there expect when people come to see me & catch up on bits that interest me later.
I know two couples, young (26-28) who will be in Windsor for the festivities tomorrow, one chap works at a school in the area and lives there & other three are going down after work today. I don't know what they'll actually see tho' have been assured they will see a lot! They want to be part of the fun, something to look back on & tell their kids. I look forward to hearing their reports when they get home Sunday. Rather them than me, I like comfort and prefer the telly, can edit out the boring bits.
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Just received an email saying 'Wedding or Wembley: as the nation is divided on which to watch, we are doing a poll about what you will be watching...'
Ffs!!!
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Since they're about 5 hours apart, it should be easy to watch both?
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The whole televising of someone's wedding makes me uncomfortable. There is a voyeurism here which is reminiscent of some Wicker Man sacrifice.
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Dear Forum,
We are not doing the royal wedding on this forum ( no not the royal we ) but I am struck with what is just happening, a little woman is sitting there not knowing where to look, she just happens to be black, there is a preacher giving his all about love, he just happens to be black.
Make of this post what you will, but I say, can you give me a AMEN :)
Gonnagle.
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Well there are three people here who shed a tear at Stand by Me.
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Well there are three people here who shed a tear at Stand by Me.
Did that just get played at the royal wedding? That is spooky, as I posted it as on the music thread as it had just played on a random selection of music I am listening to!!!
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Did that just get played at the royal wedding? That is spooky, as I posted it as on the music thread as it had just played on a random selection of music I am listening to!!!
Yes, spine tingling performance by a gospel choir.
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Dear Sane,
What!! You are not watching, you!! one of her Majs loyal subjects, Mods moderate that moderator :P :P take him to the tower 8)
Gonnagle.
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I agree with Emma
https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/tv/news/emma-thompson-royal-wedding-interview-shutdown-meghan-markle-prince-harry-a8357546.html
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Dear Forum,
We are not doing the royal wedding on this forum ( no not the royal we ) but I am struck with what is just happening, a little woman is sitting there not knowing where to look, she just happens to be black, there is a preacher giving his all about love, he just happens to be black.
Make of this post what you will, but I say, can you give me a AMEN :)
Gonnagle.
Gonners.... with you here. Meghan's mother, a brave courageous woman who coped with what must have been quite an ordeal, very gracefully.
The bishop? Maybe went on a little too long but otherwise - go that man!
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The whole televising of someone's wedding makes me uncomfortable. There is a voyeurism here which is reminiscent of some Wicker Man sacrifice.
I understand what you're saying Nearly. A marriage is a very private personal matter to be shared with family and near, dear friends. Harry and Meghan 'had' to go through this but privately I wonder if they would have loved a quiet far more discreet affair.
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Littleroses, yes the dress was lovely - the beauty of simplicity, and suited Meghan's personality very well. A most stunning tiara too, the nicest I've seen yet. Think someone said it originally belonged to Queen Mary.
Have to add..... Serena Williams looked just wonderful!
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I understand what you're saying Nearly. A marriage is a very private personal matter to be shared with family and near, dear friends. Harry and Meghan 'had' to go through this but privately I wonder if they would have loved a quiet far more discreet affair.
A significant amount of my opposition to the monarchy is based on the weirdness it forces upon those who are part of the charade.
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A significant amount of my opposition to the monarchy is based on the weirdness it forces upon those who are part of the charade.
Yes, it's as though "those who are part of the charade" are really shackled - and for life. Quite frightening.
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What a wonderful wedding! I was at work for most of it but had it on in my office and only a couple of people came in to see me - who were equally interested.
Beautiful day, marvellous music and singing, dress was so elegant; I felt as though I was there. Nothing boring about any of it.
A truly joyous occasion. Harry was quite right to want to share his wedding, it worked.
So impressed with Sheku Kanneh-Mason. I had a good cry.
Such a lovely couple, I really hope they are happy.
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David Beckham looked so much more at ease this time, but Mrs B looked positively murderous.
There was a ‘no politicians’ rule, which may explain the presence of John Major.
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There was a ‘no politicians’ rule, which may explain the presence of John Major.
:D
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Ok, I found it genuinely touching to see two people so very much in love, and I think that there was a big message sent about diversity and acceptance. I just can’t be arsed to be cynical about it when actually I found it moving - which took me totally by surprise. And my girls had the same experience, having been even more cynical than me before it started.
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Yes, I was in a joking mood beforehand but was emotionally floored by the whole thing. It was so different to anything I had expected and quite wonderful. Wish I could see it all again (well I can I suppose, already watched the bits I missed).
I bet they are all having a great time this evening, looking back on the day as a great success.
Meghan's mother was so moved at seeing her daughter looking so beautiful - and at the wonderful music and singing. A very dignified lady.
Agree with SP about Serena Williams, she looked marvellous. So did everyone else, quite impressive.
Couldn't work out why John & Norma Major were there, glad not to be alone in wondering that. I can only assume he&or she is involved in a charity that Prince Harry sponsors.
Having previously not really understood why so many members of the public wanted to virtually camp out in the streets of Windsor, they all had such a good time, I now wish I'd been there! Yet I feel as though I was there which was what the couple wanted. Prince Harry certainly is a popular chap.
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Well there you go. I just did a google and John Major was appointed guardian to William and Harry after Diana’s death in order to look after their financial and administrative interests with regard to her estate until they came of age.
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Ah that explains it & he obviously did a good job, remained a friend, which was why he was invited.
Loved Bishop Curry btw. As Sweetpea said, "Go that man".
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The whole televising of someone's wedding makes me uncomfortable. There is a voyeurism here which is reminiscent of some Wicker Man sacrifice.
You and I clearly don't go to the same kind of weddings...
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'it was just a dream'
https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=share&v=SKV6h_5XFbk