Bullying

[Roses]

When I was at my elementary school (4-14) from 1954-1961 I was bullied because my parents were better off than those of other pupils. My father unhelpfully suggested I hit them harder than they hit me! It was a relief to be sent to the Ladies College as a fee payer when I was 11 and no longer a target.

That highly unpleasant experience as a young child has made me determined to stand up for people who experience bullying. I can only imagine what it must be like to be bullied because of one's race, because one is gay, or considered different in any other way. I have no problem with people who have a faith, providing it is moderate. I do have a BIG problem with the religious extremists who bully children and the vulnerable by trying to force their faith on them, with threats if they don't convert, as happened to me.

When we lived in St Neots in Cambridgeshire in the 80s, I came across an elderly bag lady, who appeared to have some mental health issues, being horribly bullied by a gang of yobs. I couldn't walk by on the other side as everyone else was doing, so I took them on and demanded they left her alone. I thought at first they were going to assault me, but I stood my ground, and after a few minutes, which seemed like hours, they ran away, yelling some choice expletives. I hope I would do the same today if I came across someone being bullied, even if I put myself in danger. I am no sort of hero, just me being me.

How have other posters coped with being bullied, or taking on the bullies?

[Anchorman]

KIds will naturally pick on someone they perceive as different, whether through race, sexual orientation, accent, disability or whatever. The teachers can do something to mitigate it, but I doubt very much whether they can stop hard core bullying. I weasa natural target due to my visual impairment in asighted school. After enduring the "Cyclops" and "One eyed monster" stuff for years, it toughened me up; made me develop a skin - a front, which helped a bit. Secondary school was a bit difficult...the faeces in the schoolbag were a bit of a low point. However, at least I did not endure the hell a girl in my year, who had survived polio, but walked with calipers on her legs, did. More than once she was deliberately pushed downstairs. She had a nervous breakdown and attempted suicide. Sometimes that smile had to hide a lot.

[Roses]

KIds will naturally pick on someone they perceive as different, whether through race, sexual orientation, accent, disability or whatever. The teachers can do something to mitigate it, but I doubt very much whether they can stop hard core bullying. I weasa natural target due to my visual impairment in asighted school. After enduring the "Cyclops" and "One eyed monster" stuff for years, it toughened me up; made me develop a skin - a front, which helped a bit. Secondary school was a bit difficult...the faeces in the schoolbag were a bit of a low point. However, at least I did not endure the hell a girl in my year, who had survived polio, but walked with calipers on her legs, did. More than once she was deliberately pushed downstairs. She had a nervous breakdown and attempted suicide. Sometimes that smile had to hide a lot.

That is awful.  

[Harrowby Hall]

... at least I did not endure the hell a girl in my year, who had survived polio, but walked with calipers on her legs, did. More than once she was deliberately pushed downstairs. She had a nervous breakdown and attempted suicide. Sometimes that smile had to hide a lot.

And that was common assault ... or whatever its equivalent is in Scottish law. A serious criminal offence.

But I'll bet the headteacher did nothing about it. After all, protecting the good name of the school is much more important than ensuring that criminal activity is properly the subject of the justice process.

[Roses]

And that was common assault ... or whatever its equivalent is in Scottish law. A serious criminal offence.

But I'll bet the headteacher did nothing about it. After all, protecting the good name of the school is much more important than ensuring that criminal activity is properly the subject of the justice process.

I agree.

When my husband was a secondary school head he didn't tolerate bullying by pupils or staff.

[Anchorman]

And that was common assault ... or whatever its equivalent is in Scottish law. A serious criminal offence.

But I'll bet the headteacher did nothing about it. After all, protecting the good name of the school is much more important than ensuring that criminal activity is properly the subject of the justice process.

   



Oh, no!
Bill Crichton might hve been a strict disciplinarian, but he was fair - very fair. He tried very hard to get the girl to admit who had committed theseactsa, but since the bullies in question came from her own small town and had large families, she wouldn't do so.
Bill had hissuspicions, and shortly afterward, the girls were transferred to another local school. This only meant that they continued their harassment after school hours, till a few months later a bystander witnessed an incident and reported it to the boys in blue.
Given the nature of the families involved, the victim was to scared to pursue it and press charges. The subsequent activities of members of thise families in unrelated incidents may even have meant that herswas the correct descision.

[SweetPea]

One of our lads was bullied for a short time while he was at school. We tried not to make a huge thing of it and instead gave him strategies to stick-up for himself. Not long afterwards the bullying stopped.

Before I took up my career again after having a few years leave to be at home with my young family I took a dinner-lady, standing in the playground at lunchtime, wee job. Sometimes children would come to me and say so and so is bullying me. So I would call the culprit over and get him to look the other in the eye and apologise and then get them both to shake hands. This seemed to work and they would often run off laughing.

There seems to be a lot of emphasis on the victim though - which of course is understandable, but there should also be time spent looking at the bully and finding out why they are displaying such actions.   

[Steve H]

The bullying was terrible at my primary school - but at my secondary school, it was excellent. (Pinched from 'The Vicar of Dibley'.)

[ad_orientem]

I don't remember (remember being the operative word) seeing much outright bullying at my school, that's if you don't include teasing in that category. There was plenty of teasing. Anyway, never liked bullies. There's something very satisfying about seeing a bully being taken down a peg or two, preferably with a bloody nose.

[Steve H]

Interesting fact (well, I think it is): "Bully" originally meant ahearty, back-slapping, hail-fellow-well-met type of bloke, before it descended to its modern meaning. The older meaning survives in the expression "bully for you". In 'Henry V', Pistol, one of Hal's former disreputable drinking mates, says of him
"The king's a bawcock, and a heart of gold,
A lad of life, an imp of fame;
Of parents good, of fist most valiant.
I kiss his dirty shoe, and from heart-string
I love the lovely bully."

[ad_orientem]

Interesting fact (well, I think it is): "Bully" originally meant ahearty, back-slapping, hail-fellow-well-met type of bloke, before it descended to its modern meaning. The older meaning survives in the expression "bully for you". In 'Henry V', Pistol, one of Hal's former disreputable drinking mates, says of him
"The king's a bawcock, and a heart of gold,
A lad of life, an imp of fame;
Of parents good, of fist most valiant.
I kiss his dirty shoe, and from heart-string
I love the lovely bully."

Learn something every day. I like learning abiut the origins of words and sayings.

[Roses]

Interesting fact (well, I think it is): "Bully" originally meant ahearty, back-slapping, hail-fellow-well-met type of bloke, before it descended to its modern meaning. The older meaning survives in the expression "bully for you". In 'Henry V', Pistol, one of Hal's former disreputable drinking mates, says of him
"The king's a bawcock, and a heart of gold,
A lad of life, an imp of fame;
Of parents good, of fist most valiant.
I kiss his dirty shoe, and from heart-string
I love the lovely bully."

Your comments are making light of bullying, which is not to your credit.

[Steve H]

Your comments are making light of bullying, which is not to your credit.

You have no sense of humour, which is not to your credit.

[Roses]

You have no sense of humour, which is not to your credit.

Bullying is not a topic where humour should be employed. If you can't see that your single brain cell is in need of treatment!

[Anchorman]

Your comments are making light of bullying, which is not to your credit.

   




For once, I agree with LR (Shock horror)
I couldn't care less what some sixteenth cwntury sycophantic playwight scribbkd; the term is far to serious in its modern context.

[Harrowby Hall]

This is adapted from a reply I have made on another thread.



I went to a grammar school. The school's history could be traced back to the 13th century. It had a long and proud history with several notable names among its former pupils. The headmaster was a despicable man. He was a bully and a bigot. He was also a severe male chauvinist.

He refused to allow biology to be taught because he saw biology as "a girl's subject". Eventually, biology was available but only in the the "C" stream - physics and chemistry would be too difficult for pupils of such frail intellect. Anyone who wanted to do medicine at university had to leave and go to a school in another town. There was a good tennis court at the playing field - but it was never used because tennis was not perceived as a masculine sport.

He practised corporal punishment. He humiliated anyone who caused him annoyance and permitted teachers and prefects to use corporal punishment. Bullying was a standard practice throughout the school and victims were told that they should stand up for themselves.

Neither music nor drama (outside the requirements of GCE "O" and "A" level English syllabi) were taught at the school - the only music permitted was learning part-songs which the whole school sang on formal occasions such as Speech Day.

A year after I left (following "O" levels) he retired (and then died within a year or so). A new head took over and had the former headteacher been able to return, say, three years later, he would not have recognised the place.

[Nearly Sane]

   




For once, I agree with LR (Shock horror)
I couldn't care less what some sixteenth cwntury sycophantic playwight scribbkd; the term is far to serious in its modern context.

Your personal personal animosity against Shakespeare is irrelevant to the etymology of the word 'bully'. Nor is SteveH making light of the subject of bullying by pointing out the change in meaning over time.

[Roses]

Your personal personal animosity against Shakespeare is irrelevant to the etymology of the word 'bully'. Nor is SteveH making light of the subject of bullying by pointing out the change in meaning over time.

The bullying was terrible at my primary school - but at my secondary school, it was excellent. (Pinched from 'The Vicar of Dibley'.)




I think that comment is certainly making light of bullying.

[Steve H]

The bullying was terrible at my primary school - but at my secondary school, it was excellent. (Pinched from 'The Vicar of Dibley'.)




I think that comment is certainly making light of bullying.

Don't blame me; blame Richard Curtis and Paul Mayhew-Archer, who wrote 'The Vicar of Dibley'!

[Nearly Sane]

The bullying was terrible at my primary school - but at my secondary school, it was excellent. (Pinched from 'The Vicar of Dibley'.)




I think that comment is certainly making light of bullying to

Except I was replying directly to Anchorman's comment which was about the etymology of the word bully.