I find myself with very mixed feelings about the death of the Queen. I am much more upset at the news than I expected to be, and I know 96 years old, in failing health, loss of husband recently - what did I expect?
I don't believe that a modern democracy should have the anachronism that is the Royal family as any part of it.
And yet, I can't help but mourn the loss of a woman who has been there my whole life, whose commitment to duty and service cannot be faulted.
I think (tried to find it but couldn't when I looked) I said on here some time ago that we struck lucky with Elizabeth II. And we really did. She was, whether you approve of the monarchy or not, an excellent representative of our countries and a positive influence in many ways.
Did she have faults? Of course. Was she obscenely privileged? Again, of course. Still, I would argue she used that privilege to altogether greater and better effect than many of our privileged politicians.
So I find myself mourning the Queen, still thinking we would be better off without a monarchy, and feeling both confused and very sad.