With apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan.
As someday it may happen that a victim must be found,
I've got a little list, I've got a little list,
Of society offenders who might well be underground,
And never would be missed, they never would be missed,
The idiots on Facebook who insist the world is flat,
And made by God in six days - and quite recently at that -
The trolls who think the sun shines out of Donald Trump's rear end
And Nigerian princes who would like your bank details to send
You fifty thousand pounds if you'll just help them get access
To money that is rightly theirs (I'm tempted, I confess):
I'd put the whole damn lot of them upon my little list;
They'd none of them be missed, they never would be missed.
The climate change deniers would be high upon my list,
For ignoring nearly every proper climate scientist
Prefering Nigel Lawson, Viscount Monckton and UKIP
(And the other Nigel - Farage - to the gallows he will trip)
And that tousle-haired buffoon who's now our foreign secretary;
A thought that's best not dwelt on, as it's really rather scary:
They too,each one of them, will find a place upon my list
I really must insist, they never would be missed.
